Nicholas Bate

The Man who Mistook his Laptop for his Life

The story so far: read The Man who Mistook his Laptop for his Life category….

Susan. Oh, hi sweetheart, how'd it go with your parents? Oh, OK. Look our account is apparently not in order according to the bank; what's going on? Well, I did try and talk it through with you Allan. I had a feeling you weren't really listening. It's the cancelled holidays-that's a lot of lost deposits. The house extension because we're not managing it properly: you're never there to make the decisions we need to give to the builder. And the grocery bills: there's a lot of drink we buy. We're living beyond our means in all honesty, especially now I'm just doing part-time. We can sort it, but we do need to talk.

I had no idea: we do need to talk.

By Saturday evening, Allan had flu. Locking himself away from wife and son he stuck to his objectives. Tuesday am, THE presentation. Plus now he needed separately to get a robust service levels proposal sorted.

By Sunday night the PowerPoint slides and many argumentative phone calls to senior decison makers in the organisation had got him what he needed. But his voice was going and his body felt drained. Just Monday to get through for rehearsal.

Hitting bed at 7pm, he looked forward to feeling refreshed in the morning. For a fleeting second he let go; it felt good. It was good. At 0545 his first buzzer went. He felt terrible. Absolutely terrible.

Join us at 3pm next Monday. In the meantime: Get a Life.

The Man who Mistook his Laptop for his Life

The story so far: read The Man who Mistook his Laptop for his Life category….

What was he going to do? Things were going wrong everywhere. What was that calendar entry in Alison's office? "our present state of awareness is the real obstacle, for it keeps us convinced that we are small and helpless". That was definitely how he felt. But he didn't understand the quote.

On to Somerset. Returning home was always odd. Familiar yet strange. The approach track where he had played with his mates as a child. And then the farmhouse: beautiful but gloomy. As he pulled up, his mother approached; she looked well. Talking immediately about his father; he was still weak but a lot better. As he entered the farmhouse, those distinctive smells. That warmth of the Aga.

He sat close to his father. He looked well, if a little frail. They talked. How he felt. How things were. Allan was there, but not really there.

It grew dark outside; he turned down the offer of a meal. It was time to go; he promised to return soon. He knew he hadn't spend enough time with them. The car's lights pierced the gloom. Who could compare a luxury car with a loving relationship? Maybe he could get them to move: something more manageable. Somewhere where he could keep a better eye on them. He brightened: a solution. An action.

He headed back to the M5 and north to the M4. Even in this car his back ached. He rang his bank on the hands-free. After the usual tedious security questions, Allan enquired about a possible bridging loan requirement for his parents. The account manager was young, anonymous, polite but insistent that it wouldn't be that easy with the current state of his account. Allan insisted his status was supurb. 'It was Sir' came the polite response, but you've been down-graded...your expenditure over the last few months...yes, you were informed. This is crazy; he disconnected.

What was going on? He needed to speak to Susan.

Join us at 3pm next Monday. In the meantime: Get a Life.

The Man who Mistook his Laptop for his Life

The story so far: read The Man who Mistook his Laptop for his Life category….

0630 Saturday
Dawn was breaking as he left the M4 for the M5. It had been hard getting going but the view was beautiful. And perhaps this enforced time out was good for him. He switched off the raido; he was feeling a little sleep...woahhh...Heck. Horns sounding. Lights flashing. He stopped on the hard shoulder. Someone pulled up behind him. What was happening? You OK, fella? Did you not see me flashing? You've been weaving-falling asleep-for the last mile. Get yourself some proper rest before you kill yourself and others, too. Sure you're OK? Well, see ya. Here's my card.

Woaahhh! Had he fallen asllep? At the wheel? On a motorway? That close to death? He walked slowly up and down as trucks thundered by. The breeze and the adrenaline woke him up.

He had been asleep; he didn't know for how long. If that guy hadn't flashed him....stop thinking; it was too dangerous. He needed to get off the motorway, and definitely off this shoulder. It was about two miles to the next services. He drove carefully at around 60 mph, not trusting himself.

He pulled up, relaxed and looked at the card. He laughed. Cool guy. And as he did he noticed his face felt odd; it was such a long time since he had laughed. He stuffed the card in his pocket.

Join us at 3pm next Monday. In the meantime: Get a Life.

The Man who Mistook his Laptop for his Life

The story so far: read The Man who Mistook his Laptop for his Life category….

1230
He drafted an e-mail with the new plan and sent it to the entire team.

1300
He started one-to-ones with each team member to advise on consequences of the model error and their role in the turn-around plan.

1545
A call came from his Mother. She never rang his mobile. Was all OK?
He listened; his mother was worried. Dad had had a minor stroke. Allan moved quickly to ‘find a solution’ mode. He’d immediately arrange a specialist he insisted. He’d be down as soon as the presentation was over. No, he couldn’t come sooner. Why do these things always come at once?
He switched off his mobile and took another paracetamol.

No, this was wrong. He rang his mother back. He’d be there Saturday, early. No, not tonight. But he would be there. He felt drained. He completed the one-to-ones at 1845.

2115
He left for home.

Join us at 3pm next Monday. In the meantime: Get a Life.

The Man who Mistook his Laptop for his Life

The story so far: read The Man who Mistook his Laptop for his Life category….

1100
He left the building and crossed to the park. It was odd this bug he had; he simply wasn’t able to get rid of it. It was really flu-like. He popped a paracetamol and sat on a park bench. His body certainly felt odd. Their USP had been price. The competition’s was service. The decision criteria were weighted to price so long as they hit the service thresholds. However, now neither potential supplier could offer excellence on price. So, they’d better become outstanding on service. Here was the strategy, then: maintain a small price lead. It would still be a large saving on such a larger order, but totally re-position service. And that’s what he would do. That was the paradigm-shift which was needed. He had wanted to wait until he got his formal directorship to tackle it, but now was the perfect time: he’d tackle it now. That would delight the customer and commit the organisation to the service levels he needed. The work-load would be a killer, but he could create the frame-work over the week-end. This new emphasis would simply re-strengthen his personal credibility.

1140
He wandered back via the local M&S Simply Foods. They had great juices: cranberry and something plus a tuna and sweetcorn sandwich. Perhaps fewer coffees would help.

Join us at 3pm next Monday. In the meantime: Get a Life.

The Man Who Mistook his Laptop for his Life

The story so far: read the Man Who Mistook His Laptop for His Life category….

90 minutes later
It was official. The model on which they had placed so much hope was incorrect. It had carried a small but crucial error since the margin change. And Allan knew exactly whose fault it was. His. He didn’t say anything and asked John to re-build the model with full validation checks.

60 minutes later
A correct model was ready. Allan personally fed the figures into the model. Yep. To offer the pricing they had committed to would require them to lose 8% margin, which was simply unacceptable. He sat back. He ached: all over. He was on his own in the office. None of the team knew this yet. To be more precise, they knew it was bad, but they did not realise how bad.
He closed down his laptop and moved to stare out of the window. The traffic was frenzied as usual, but not a sound reached him in his perfect cage. This was not going to be easy, but he wouldn’t be beaten. What were his options? He could resign. At this stage? When he was so close? He could withdraw from the bid: exercise basic sales practice and recognize there is simply some business you do not want. No way. Literally the whole company was dependent upon this in the year-end figures. He could go back to Greg asking him to think long-term and take the short-term hit. But he knew Greg: he wouldn’t do it. Greg would say: 'use your skill'; 'use psychology'; 'make it happen'. And as much as he hated Greg, that’s what he needed to do. How, he didn’t have a clue. But first he needed to clear his head.

Join us at 3pm next Monday. In the meantime: Get a Life.

The Man Who Mistook His Laptop for His Life

The story so far....see The Man Who Mistook His Laptop For His Life category.....

Office. Laptop on. Need to give this spreadsheet a final over-haul before pulling out the key figures into the PowerPoint presentation. Let’s just check them one-by-one by hand; there’s no way I want to be caught out by any of these people by an error in a cell somewhere.. these figures have been massaged so much over the last week. But they are good. They are very impressive. These people really can have their cake and eat it. For 90 seconds his whole body froze and his deep fatigue almost disappeared.

If I were the audience I might almost feel these figures were too good. Allan paused. These figures were too good. He’d been blind, too tired, almost too focused on the end point. With the recent margin shifts they couldn’t be that good. His chest tightened. He wasn’t going to let this slip from his grasp at this point. He removed the locks on the sheet and linked models and pressed re-calc. No change: it was unfortunately fully up-to-date. So, think. The output or displayed models were correct so either the input data was wrong or the model was wrong or both. Let’s check the original input data. He checked the sixteen key input figures-all correct. Shit: the model was wrong. He scanned formulae in cells. It looked OK but it wasn’t really his forte. But the realisation was correct: the model was wrong. SHIT! He got up and phoned John. He caught him on the train. John-get a taxi at the station. Don’t hang about. The model is wrong. And I’ve done some initial calculations and we’re about 7.25% too low on margin for us. It’s not acceptable. Get here as quickly as you can.

Allan paced. The fatigue-so early in the day-was enormous. Come on, John.

(Next instalment: 8th January 2007)
To be continued. In the meantime: Get a Life

The Man Who Mistook His Laptop for His Life

The story so far....see The Man Who Mistook His Laptop For His Life category.....

0545 Friday morning

This morning was harder than ever: he staggered a little when his legs took his weight as he left the bed. This was tricky. If getting into the shower was tough, getting out was even tougher. Trying to be as quiet as he gathered clothes he realised there was no clean and ironed shirt. On this of all days. No bloody shirt-this was ridiculous. He shouted.

His wife awoke in shock then amazement. His son ran in clutching clown. Allan calmed. He said: look I’ve got to go. He knew he had to. All would be fine in a few days. Look, I’ll wear this polo shirt-it’ll be fine. I have to go. Let’s talk later. Let’s sort Tuscany.

As he drove to the station, he couldn’t believe his own behaviour. If there was one thing he usually had it was self-control. At the station he sent a text apologising and sending his love. But his hand was shaking and he wasn’t feeling all that great.

On the train he didn’t even open his lap-top: he stared at the grey metallic surface all the way to Paddington.

At Paddington, he was off the train. His phone pinged: we love you too said the text. He walked more slowly. He surprised the Big Issue seller by giving him a £10.00 note. He felt very emotional. Shit.

He took a slightly different route. He needed a strong coffee. He must get back on track: he stopped at a small Italian place. The friendliness of the owner was remarkably healing.

(Next instalment: 1st January 2007)
To be continued. In the meantime: Get a Life

The Man who Mistook his Laptop for his Life

...the story so far: see the man who mistook his laptop for his life category...

Chapter 2: Crisis
The next day sped by. A round of project team meetings to prepare for the key presentation. Long conference calls to the US as ‘final points’ came through. Allan remained in a bizarre state: he had no awareness of anything but his work. He fuelled via coffee and sandwiches. His link with the world and his team was via his lap-top. All communication-at his request-was e-mail. All decisions were based upon a set of metrics buried in a spreadsheet in his machine. His meetings and flow of the day were planned in the same way.

His laptop was his heart and soul. He made sure he did not sit down long enough to fall asleep. His body felt odd: sort of tingly, sort of ‘not there’. And the odd taste in his mouth was not going away.

He’d had to ignore calls from home: he was sure they would understand. This was his No 1 priority. He had to remember that there was now only one measure of his success: closing this deal. He clung to three items: laptop, coffee, cigarettes. In that order.

As he finally closed his laptop on the last train home that evening he felt things were looking good for the next day.

The Man Who Mistook His Laptop for His Life

The story so far....see The Man Who Mistook His Laptop For His Life category.....

OK. focus. He wasn't going to be screwed at this stage. He may find Greg repellent, but after this deal the dotted line would disappear. He loaded up the slide set.

1530 Project Team Meeting.
Guys I'd like to make this very brief; let me summarise how we stand. We're well up for the business. We have two main weaknesses. The first we have always had: support. Alison and Jerry, the preliminary story you created and I reviewed needs to be strengthened. It's too much like a Centre Parcs brochure at the moment. I want some figures, some grit and some client quotes. I know: get them anyway. But, second, and here's the sting, Paul. Our current pricing model is blown. We have to build our margin by two points. I know, I know. I could resign if you like, but I don't think it would make much difference! Let's get to work, win the business.I'll be sending out a schedule of meetings. PS Clear your diary-everything-until the presentation. Assume you'll need to take time out of your weekend. The personal reward for everyone of us in the room is very, very high. I DO NOT intend to lose this business.

1645 Personal calls to wife and son.
Hi. I'm sorry. Yeah, I'll be late. I know. I know. It'll be different soon.

1900 Two hours work still ahead.
He felt tired, very tired, his limbs ached. He could do without flu. He'd had that a week ago and worked through it with cold cure stuff. He could do with a decent coffee. He went outside for a cigarette.

2010
These client stories are terrible: they need a re-write.

2130
He acknowledged the security guard as he headed home.

2320
Microwaved cottage pie. Odd taste.

2350
Instant sleep

0300
Awake worrying

0545
Alarm.