How To Think Like: The Guy At The Boxing Day Sales

1. Come on, come on. Open! It's 0959. Open up!

2. At last! Run: through home-care. Up the escalator. Through ladies...

3. Oh. Sorry. It's only a scratch: it'll heal. Got to go...

4. Here we are menswear. Where are they? Ahh ha!

5. BUT WHERE ARE THE SIZE M's?

6. I clearly KNOW it's a bl**dy sale. No I am NOT stressed.

7. I love getting a real bargain.